I’d introduce myself but you know who I am.
You’ve been in my life for years now, you came in and turned it upside down….
Little did I know it would never be the same again.
I’m not going to say it’s been easy because it really hasn’t.
The constant pain you’ve put me in, the sleepless nights, the never ending toilet trips.
You’ve been pretty relentless.
I’d love to say I didn’t resent you, but at the start I did.
You’ve taken many things from me, you’ve stripped me of my confidence, my dignity, even some friendships.
You’ve put me through hell, the endless toilet trips, the bleeding, the accidents.
It’s sad when ‘pooing’ yourself becomes a normality.
The anxiety of going out and not knowing where the nearest toilet is.
The strain of this on your mental health.
Why me? Why now?
You took my independence from me, I didn’t want to do anything anymore.
The sheer strength it took to keep going, there were times I just wanted to give up.
I just wanted to be normal.
I didn’t want to tell anyone what was happening to me.
- The sleepless nights
- The constant pain
- The fatigue
- The depression
- The toilet trips
- The anxiety
- The surpressed immune system
- The accidents
- The failed medications
Just some of things that are a daily struggle.
I’d like to think we’re friends now but I know you’ll surprise me when I least expect it.
You’re unpredictable at the best of times.
This is my life now.
You are now part of me.